New Year, New You: The Problem with the Resolution Mindset

There’s something about the turning of the clock that makes us all want to change things up. So much so that we put off changing things until the New Year, as though it’s a “cleaner break” from the way we did things before.

However, while I myself am not immune to the odd New Year’s Resolution, a fresh-year mindset, or pushing a commitment to January 1st, there are several problems with this tradition. In case you haven’t discovered them yourself, let me outline the big ones, and give a few, more biblically focused options instead!

1) The first problem is wasted time:

When we get stuck in a New Years Resolution mindset, we often wait to change something till the New Year begins, even though we’ve wanted to change for a while. Perhaps we feel like we’ll stick to it more if we declare the whole year a “changed year.”

But, in reality, God has said that His mercies renew every morning (Lamentations 3:22) and there’s literally nothing to stop us from making our change in this immediate moment.

It is such a beautiful gift to have a fresh day every day. And I personally believe I see more success with I embark on a change as soon as I’m convicted about it, rather than some arbitrary date and time of society’s choosing.

Every day counts and every day holds the potential that we often reserve for the New Year.

2) The second problem is the “all or nothing” mindset:

When we shackle our change to an entire year timeline (or an “all or nothing” mindset), we are much more likely to become discouraged when we miss a day week, or a month. We’re willing to throw out an entire month of good attempts because we fell off the truck a handful of times!

But what we find biblically, is that few changes are instant and total. Most of the disciples themselves struggled with character flaws throughout the entire gospel, until we see them having grown in their twilight years.

Change is gradual, and the renewal of the mind spoken about in Ephesians 4:22-24 is meant to be a constant, almost daily, thing.

Every little bit makes a difference and the “all or nothing” approach is unrealistic and quite frankly setting ourselves up for failure.

3) The third problem has to do with motivation:

If you’ve been around for a while, you may have heard of the BE, DO, HAVE model. It goes like this:

“Who do we need to BE, in order to DO the things we need to DO, in order to HAVE the things we want?”

It speaks to an internal change fueling an outward change and is a far more successful method of habit-forming than adding a “to-do” list on its own.

But a lot of time our resolutions skip the “BE” entirely. They focus on what we think we need to “DO” in order to “HAVE” the things we want. (I need to go to the gym every day, so I get my beach body, or I need to clean my house every day, because it’ll give me more peace).

But skipping the BE often leaves us with half-hearted attempts and abandoned resolutions by February 1st.

Instead, we need to look inward and find a stronger anchoring motivation that helps us keep going when we “don’t feel like it.”

In example, rather than going to the gym for the beach body, you might decide you want to BE a healthy parent and grandparent, and the gym is part of that. So are better eating habits. Or maybe you desire to BE more intentional about your mental health, becoming a better and more disciplined steward of your wellness, which, in turn, helps you prioritize cleaning your spaces. Ultimately that peace at the end of the day ends up being a byproduct of a changed motivation.

digress a bit with examples, but I wanted to make my points clear.

So.

Rather than waiting to make your change, start today with the mindset that every day is an opportunity for fresh mercies and fresh starts.

And rather than thinking of a personal change as something to be conquered by a date, why not commit to the renewing of your mind, body and spirit as many times as you can within your desired timeline? Celebrating every time you got it right, as one more time than the times you got it wrong.

And instead of focusing on what you want to get out of a resolution, perhaps we focus on a new aspect to our personhood that we would like to BE, and let the resolutions flow from that.

If we apply these three small changes this year, there’s nothing to say we won’t be successful in the changes we wish to make!

 #newyearsresolution #newyears #resolutions #renewing #renewyourmind #bedohave