The Rich Young Ruler
Surrender: If You’re Reading this, You are the Rich Young Ruler
Mark 10:17-27 (NIV)
17 As Jesus started on his way, a man ran up to him and fell on his knees before him. “Good teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?” 18 “Why do you call me good?” Jesus answered. “No one is good—except God alone. 19 You know the commandments: ‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, you shall not defraud, honor your father and mother.’” 20 “Teacher,” he declared, “all these I have kept since I was a boy.” 21 Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”22 At this the man’s face fell. He went away sad, because he had great wealth.
Growing up as a Christian, I’ve heard this story hundreds of times, usually taught the same way: don’t love money more than God. But it’s ok to have lots of money, in fact God wants you to have lots of money. This ‘teaching’ left something to be desired.
In my later years, I sympathize with this man, the rich young ruler, and beg you to remember that he was a real person. He seems to have been a man conflicted and insecure (like we all are sometimes) but sincere and passionate about serving God. However, he also seems to be a man who loved the power and security of his wealth. Jesus insightfully asked, in love, for him to give up the one thing that would prevent him from being a disciple. The man walks away grieving. Not angry, not sad, but grieving what he just lost.
What did he lose? Perhaps, he saw his life as a devout, honorable, God-fearing leader crumble before him—he grieved his identity as the man who had it all. But after one request from Jesus, the man chose not to follow him. He chose not to surrender so he could cling to the idol of the identity he had built for himself.
In reflecting on idolatry and surrender I have come back to this parable and found a poignant and difficult truth: I am the rich young ruler too.
My Achilles Heal, Healed
Over a year ago, I ruptured my Achilles tendon and required extensive repair surgery and physical therapy. I was in a boot and on crutches for 16 weeks. For a person who is at the gym 5-6 times a week and who runs the odd 10k just to stay loose, this was a very difficult time. In fact, it was a dark time, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I lost 20lbs in muscle and gained 20lbs in fat. I struggled with ongoing depression even a year later (for which I sought professional support from a clinical psychologist).
As a full-time Pastoral Care Pastor, I give most of my working (and non-working) hours to people undergoing crises and trauma. Any time outside of that is committed to my family and friends. I’m generally happy and well-balanced in this and I don’t have regrets. But my main area of self-care, the place that is ‘mine’ is the gym. Beneficial for both my physical and mental wellbeing, I spend 2-3 hours a day, 5 days a week in the gym. It may come across as disciplined, but honestly, I just really enjoy it. It is the ONE place I don’t think of anything but the workout.
The gym was not my idol though. And over the course of that difficult year of injury, prayer, fasting, anger and depression, God helped reveal what my true problem was: my idol was control. The challenges of ministry and living abroad with a young family often made me feel helpless. So, I made a shrine where I could.
How ironic that the injury was to my “Achilles heel,” a mythology allusion used to represent a person’s crippling weakness. God didn’t cause my injury, but he sure used it. Control was the thing I was unwilling to ‘give away’ as the rich young ruler wouldn’t give away his possessions. I hadn’t surrendered all to God; I wanted to keep something closed off, for me. This is, in essence, idolatry. It’s not the idol itself, but what we derive from it that causes us to dishonor God and stumble.
Idolatry isn’t new but it has changed over the years. The concept is the same. Whatever we pray to, wherever we look for hope, security, identity, blessing, or pleasure, other than God, that is our idol. Today’s idols are not as obvious as gold statues. They are hidden; attached like parasites on the things we think are the idol. Unfortunately, when many Christians (myself included) seek to dismantle our idols we stop short of the true source.
If I had given up the gym, I would’ve found something else to give me that sense of control I desperately wanted.
A common example I hear about is giving up social media. We may give up social media because we think it’s a distracting idol. But the Bible never says idols are merely distractions – they are evil. They anger God and rob Him of his due worship. They are what we worship instead of God.
I don’t think anyone worships social media. Instead, they worship the sense of validation they derive from it. And if your validation comes from anywhere other than God, we’ve found an idol. Quitting social media will not dismantle the idol of validation.
No one worships money; they worship the power it gives them. No one worships their romantic relationship; they worship the identity of wholeness in another person. No one worships their job; they worship the sense of purpose it gives them. No one worships their wardrobe; they worship the status it gives them. No one worships a nice house; they worship the feeling of happiness.
If we are not careful, we will only treat the symptoms, not the sickness. We are called to a deeper, holier way of life than simple virtue signaling, life hacks, and project self.
What now?
Maybe I’ve convinced you. Maybe, like me, you realized you were praying to and worshipping something other than God, keeping something from Him that he asked for, or fooling yourself with a redefinition of who God even is. What should we do now?
Repent.
Always start here. Even if you can’t define what it is you’re repenting for (Psalm 139:23-24), you invite God in to reveal that which must be dealt with. The process begins with humility:
I may need to change some major things about myself and my life to continue following Christ honestly.
Humble yourself to change.
Change sounds great until it’s time to change. No one ever grows without humility. The Good news is we follow a humble savior who will empower you (Phil 2:6-8).
I may need to give away and say goodbye to things I have loved more than God. My life may need to look to radically different than it does now. My change may cause people I love to resist my new choices.
Ask yourself hard questions.
What is the one thing you hope that Jesus would never ask you to give up?
What is the identity, fear, pleasure, or security attached to that thing? This is where you’ll find the idol. Holy Spirit will give you the answers as you wait, silently, and listen.
I may learn that the thing I’ve made an idol isn’t a bad thing, it’s just how I have used it that needs to change. I also may find that I need to get rid of this thing entirely.
Ask God for strength.
You will be filling the void left by the idol with God’s presence and mercy. That’s painful and can take a long time. But God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:8-10).
I may need professional help, spiritual guidance, and friends to support me.
Be honest with yourself, but not hard on yourself.
God loves you and He delights in you (Psalm 18:19).
It is ok if it takes me several tries and lots of help to dismantle these idols. God loves me no matter how I struggle.