The Temptation of Birthday Presents
I recently took my six-year-old daughter to buy a birthday present for her friend.
Now, any parent will tell you that’s a bit of a gamble at that age, but thankfully, my daughter did well, and we made it all the way home without a single request to buy something for herself! But as we begin the wrapping process, my daughter starts examining the gift closer, and I watch her from the corner of my eye, as something changes.
“Mom,” she suddenly says, “I really want this.”
Oh boy. Here we go.
“Honey, you bought this for your friend,” I gently remind, “you just had a birthday—”
And I think that’s as far as I got. My darling daughter erupted in a full-on tantrum, demanding the present for herself!
Immediately I wanted to go into correction mode. As parents, we hate seeing these emotions in our children—selfishness, jealousy—and we want to make sure they know they’re B.A.D.
But before I reacted, I paused and realized I knew exactly what she was feeling. I, myself, had felt it many times. I’d felt selfish, been jealous, compared, and wanted a thing that wasn’t mine. We all have. In those moments, does God shame us? Does he make us feel like dirt for experiencing those feelings? Not at all. He convicts, and if we choose to listen, walks us to the wise choice.
1 Corinthians 10:13 reassures us:
“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.”
So, I tried a different tact.
“Hey, I know you’re a good kid who wants to be kind,” I said, “what you’re feeling is normal. But Jesus doesn’t tell us to be normal. He tells us to be different. When we’re feeling selfish, he asks us to be generous. But I get that it’s hard because generosity takes practice.”
Now, these “teachable moments” are run-of-the-mill in a parent’s life. But often we miss what the moments are truly about. So many of us jump to the correction without looking at the root cause of the behavior. This is like putting a band-aid over an internal wound.
When I told my daughter it was normal to want the toy for herself, I was coming from an understanding that our world is fallen, and unfortunately, not even my six-year-old daughter is safe from that reality. Even at a young age I’ve watched her flesh tempt her to make the wrong, selfish, or even hurtful choice.
In a fallen landscape such as ours, no one is immune to the temptation of sin and death.
Not even Jesus.
That’s hard to read, I bet, and even harder to write. But it’s true.
Hebrews 4:15 says:
“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weakness, but one who, in every respect, has been tempted as we are, yet is without sin.”
I’ve always adored this verse. It connected me to Jesus early on, and I’ve since delved into its implications, many times.
Questions surface like:
Does that mean Jesus was ever tempted to be greedy?
Did he ever want to take control rather than trust?
Write people off rather than show grace?
Hold a grudge?
Get revenge?
And here’s an uncomfortable one—was he ever sexually tempted? In thought or deed?
This verse confirms, that yes, he would’ve been.
And yet he was without sin.
Why is this so powerful to know? I think for a few reasons.
It lets us know that Jesus understands our temptations on an intimate level. This brings immense comfort in the times when our temptations can make us feel profoundly alone and helpless.
It lets us know that the temptation itself is not the sin. This is HUGE. Our temptations come first and foremost from the fact that our world has been corrupted since the beginning of our time on earth. Billy Graham has a famous quote:
“We are fallen creatures living in a fallen world, that has been twisted and corrupted by sin, and we all share in its brokenness.”
The enemy to our soul is real, but even he doesn’t have to be personally involved in each temptation because they’re woven into the world around us. Sin comes when we indulge and fall into the temptation. Understanding that nuance will help us avoid the pitfalls of shame and guilt. Temptation is common on this earth, in fact, it’s expected.
Finally, the fact that Jesus experienced all temptation and yet DID NOT SIN, should be powerful for the simple reason that His victory can be our victory.
“For because he himself has suffered when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted,” Hebrews 2:18
Jesus is God, yes, but he was also man. His victory lets us know that it is possible to resist, and win out against temptation, and not let it lead to sin.
So, practically, how do we resist temptation?
Search your own weaknesses.
James 1:14 says we are tempted when we are enticed by natural desires. These will be different for all of us, and “custom made” (how kind!) to our journeys, weakness, and strengths. Understanding them will help us be proactive and stand firm.
Pray.
Multiple times Jesus instructs us to pray so that we don’t fall into temptation. He knew it would happen, and he knew that prayer was one of the main ways we could stand firm. The Lord’s prayer itself reads “lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.” If Jesus prayed it, so should we.
Use the Word of God.
In each of Jesus’s recorded temptations (Matthew 4-11), he spoke the actual Word of God to resist. Think about that—he WAS the Word, and yet he still spoke the Word to resist the enemy. That should tell us how powerful it is! It’s living, strong and able to come alongside you at any moment.
Accept His Grace.
We must understand that while we have his help, wisdom, and the power of his spirit in us, unfortunately we won’t live this out perfectly. And when (not if) we fail, we are so blessed to have the grace of Jesus to pick us back up.
But still, we must try. Like I told my daughter, we must practice. Because there’s a world that needs to see how we were meant to live, and to show them, we first need to know the difference between what the world calls normal, and what Jesus asks of us. And we need to fight to live that way.
Someday it will be different, I promise. But until then, stand firm!